Image Credit: Dr. Seuss Art

The Day the Sneetches Got Out the Vote

Since we last saw the sneetches with stars and without,

They seemed to be happy, all seemed without doubt

To be wanting the best for each sneetch of each sort—

At least, so it seemed from the last sneetch report.

But since then some sneetches away in an attic

Have been hatching a plan a bit less democratic,

A plan that began with that monkey McBean

Who knew greedy sneetches were keen on his schemes.

“It used to be stars,” said McBean with a grin,

“That determined which sneetches would lose and would win.

But now that each sneetch has a vote, has a say,

If you want to rule beaches, there’s only one way.

You need a machine that is sneaky and slick:

My Sneetch Vote-Suppressor can fix this up quick.”

“First tell me which sneetches have broken some law,”

Said McBean to the sneetches who stood there in awe.

Though they knew it was wrong to point and to shout

They singled out sneetches who now were without.

McBean twisted a dial and jotted down notes

And his awful machine began sucking up votes.

And though some with stars were distressed and unnerved

There were others who argued this fate was “deserved.”

“There need to be rules,” said one star-bellied sneetch,

As McBean slipped him cash and then dashed from the beach.

“You see?” said McBean. “Why you can teach a sneetch!”

As the sneetch vote-suppressor was picking up steam

McBean fired up the next part of his scheme.

“If you want to rule beaches, you have to draw lines.

If you draw them at night, why then nobody minds.

My Sneetch Beach-Divider’s my latest design!”

That night, like he said, it criss-crossed the beaches

Dividing up sections for each of the sneetches

Who awoke to discover a very strange thing

That the sneetches without were all grouped in one ring

While the sneetches with stars had two rings—no four!

Though much wasn’t clear, it was clear who had more.

And when those without said these lines were unfair

That star-bellied sneetch with his snoot in the air

Told them, “My friends, we drew these with care.

These lines are the lines that have always been there.”

(As he winked at McBean sitting up in his chair.)

But McBean wasn’t done, he had one more machine.

It was ugly and fearsome and gruesome and green.

“Behold!” said McBean to the greediest sneetches.

“The key to maintaining your rule of the beaches.

The Bamboozler-McDoozler Three-Thousand-and-Six

Guaranteed to confuse and sow doubt with its tricks.”

Now some sneetches knew things were quite out of hand.

McBean had done more than most sneetches had planned.

But the hunger for more was a terrible itch,

And so no one spoke up as McBean flipped the switch.

And the Boozler-McDoozler began roaming beaches,

Printing false statements, confusing the sneetches.

Though voting was planned for November the third,

The Doozler told sneetches, “That’s not what I heard!”

It said left was right, and the right thing was wrong,

And the wrong thing was left, which was right all along.

And perhaps worst of all, it convinced unsure sneetches

That their vote wouldn’t count, wouldn’t help shape the beaches.

The Doozler, Divider, Suppressor, and more

All did their job well and they tilted the score.

And the greediest sneetches gained more and more power

While McBean just got richer with each passing hour.

That’s the way that it was and it likely would be

If not for some sneetches like you and like me.

Some sneetches who chose to do more than just vote

But who called and who texted and canvassed and wrote,

Who registered, rallied, remembered the roles

That each sneetch must play getting out to the polls.

The sneetches with stars and the sneetches without

Reached out to each other and broke through the doubt.

And though his machines grew louder and bolder,

McBean and his schemes were reduced to a smolder.

Despite the suppression, division, confusion

The sneetches together broke through the illusion

That their votes didn’t matter—they mattered a lot,

And when they were counted, they got what they sought.

But was the fight over? Most certainly not!

Because though they had won and had learned quite a bit

McBean was still lurking, refusing to quit.

The only way sneetches could keep the beach fair

Was by staying involved and remaining aware.

(And keeping an eye out for snoots in the air).

In this sense, their story is yet to be told.

It’s up to each sneetch as to what will unfold.

It begins in this moment, with work and with trust

That if I stand for you, then the we stands for us.